attentive ear; the more I learned

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I only learned the value of listening when some people opened a part of their life to me not necessarily to seek advice but only to talk. In being silent while others were talking, I found out that those who say something to you do not necessarily ask for an advice but only to pour out something that they cannot anymore bear, that they only want an attentive ear, and after that nothing else more. I found out that listening to my students and clientele as well as to the people in my apostolate area broaden my self-knowledge and confidence simply because the more I listen to them; the more I became aware of my own needs of a listening ear. The more I listen to them, the more I become human.

It is only in listening that I learned to listen to what my students and clientele is not saying; truths that are not manifested in mere words but what they actually are saying, a reality that I often neglect because I concentrate too much on what they verbally expresses. I learned to explore the world of the person talking to me through the realities that they express. In reflection, I can vividly see myself in their shoes, and experiencing the reality that they feel for the moment. Of course, I have to suspend all of my biases and the so-called messianic complex, so that the other could express well.

When I listen to one of the parishioners in our apostolate area, I learned so many things not from the words that she was saying but what was actually happening deep inside her. I hate to see people cry in front of me, but I found out that I have the capacity to listen well if I am only to remove those preoccupations as well as the stereotyping that has been my habit before. In a larger sense, I learned a bit of lesson on what it is to be human from the perspective of the expressing other, the more I listen with an attentive ear; the more I learned to love the person talking next to me, since the more they discloses themselves, the more I become a part of them and they are part of me. Perhaps I did not realize this because I found listening to other people so corny, especially when they start to cry. For me, crying while disclosing oneself was just nothing but too dramatic for a person and I often thought that it is too dramatic.

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